Photos are still a little dicey. I am always afraid of what I might be confronted by. When I was at my biggest I had a really well constructed bubble of delusion. No joke I think I shaved half my body off with my own magical blinders. This is one of my photos that helped me get real and realize. This was April 2009 about when I started seeing Marisa.
Ooh I know that bubble, I know it really well and lived in it for quite a time as I was climbing to my heaviest. I really had no idea how frighteningly out of control things had become and how insular my worlds was.
ReplyDeleteThat I think was the hardest part for me. Not changing my eating habits but seeing how much I had hidden from myself. I just felt like what next? What lie will I catch myself in next?!
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