Big News

I have talked about my wings before. I have pretty major excess skin on my arms. At first it was like this chicken cutlet that hung from the upper arm. As I lost weight and actually began to create muscle it spread. I now have a hang from elbow to upper arm. I am not going to lie. It's not pretty and I hate it. I HATE IT. I will not wear anything that shows it, and even certain sleeved articles of clothing also show it. It's a big bummer but one I have been able to temper by saying well one day you'll get it dealt with. Well...

My mom had a little upper arm hang going on as well. She's spent the past year diligently working out seeing if she could remedy her situation. No such luck. She got her arms done last week. I went with her for her consult and then she booked it for a week after that. I can not even tell you how not a big deal it was. I picked her up from surgery and she was with it, not in pain, moving about and trying to make kirs. I was flagging that maybe wine was not the best idea, and was met with who was ever hurt by a little wine. I was less worried about the wine and a little more worried about the general anesthesia you were under just a few hours ago for the record mama. I called the next day and made an appointment with her surgeon for a consult.

I saw Dr. Abramson yesterday for the arm lift, and a thigh lift. The thigh lift is a hot mess of issues and I am not 100% ready for it both physically and mentally. It's a complicated procedure, high infection rate, and significant recovery time. He suggested we lipo my thighs while I am under and warned me it is going to make my loose skin worse, but in the long run it will help him make a better recommendation for what procedure I should have done to fix them long term. Really the lipo is less to reduce them and more to speed up the excess skin process. While part of this makes me want to throw up, I feel like the trade off is I gain my arms. The summer is approaching and I am so tired of dressing like I am amish. At least if I can have my arms out I am okay with working around my legs. I am not sure I will have the thigh lift. I have to think on it a bit more, but I have booked the arms. I will be removing the excess skin a week from today. EEEEEEK!!!!! When he said you are ready and should do them now I almost passed out. I was completely expecting him to say you're not at your goal here's some info come back when you're thinner. I mean said better then that but you get my point. I was not at all expecting for what I have been wanting for years to be available to me. I slept on it last night, called my mom because she's paying for it, and she said I am all for it, and do what you want, but you have to make this decision. I called the office today and set it into motion. I go for my pre-op tomorrow to take photos, get my prescription, and the blood work order and then Tuesday is wings no more day.

The procedure itself is super straightforward. He basically takes the wing, cuts it off and sews it up. He said my recovery may be easier then my mom's because he had to do more work on her and because she had concerns regarding scars he had to sew everything into her armpit. I will have a scar from elbow to arm pit. It is undetermined right now if it will be more underneath or on the side. I mean it's going to be a long scar no matter where it is so whether it's on the side or underneath really does not matter to me. I feel a scar is a small price to pay to be able to wear short sleeves. I heal pretty well and classically have not scarred badly so I am not really sweating it. I did review with him exactly what would be leaving so I do not have unrealistic expectations and since there is no real lift component for me, but just a removal. I do not want to go through this and then be let down by the results. I had some concerns with the backs of my arms by the arm pit if that would be raised any, because it sags down, when he showed me that part of that will also be removed it alleviated my concerns. When I have a chance I will post some pics of my arms despite being loath to do it, and of course will share my after.

I am a little in shock honestly. I am a little scared, but mostly I am excited. Honestly booking it with the surgical coordinator I wanted to puke. It definitely feels emotional and like it's these last stages of who I was being left behind. I am not that girl anymore and while I know that, it feels weird and exciting to literally be able to cut off some of that evidence or remaining person. I am tired of carrying it around whether it's weight, scars of weight or excess skin I do not want it anymore. I have served my time, I have paid my dues, I have done my penance and now it is time to be able to enjoy the work I have done. I plan to celebrate with tank tops. Lashings and lashings of tank tops!