I am struggling to stay afloat in a sea of manchildren and emotional eating temptation. On top of it all I am having a hard time staying on work out track. I worked out this morning despite oversleeping. I managed 20 minutes. I felt so guilty about this but then shook it off and instead realized it was 20 minutes more cardio then sleeping would have been.
My goal tomorrow is to get my act together and do a full 45 minutes. I also have to take clients out three times this week. What does that mean? Restaurant food and booze. Not a great combo. It's more calories then I would usually intake. Last night I had an entree skipped dessert and a starter, but did have two glasses of wine. The wine was mostly my misguided attempt to make the tension headache I had disappear. It didn't disappear but it did make me care less about it which I took as a semi-victory.
I try to keep reminding myself do what I can when I can. Take a deep breath and ride the wave and do not give into temptation to just eat the stress away. I just feel gross. I feel like I've gained 20 pounds in a hot second. I know I haven't but lately I have been drinking more, off my usual eating schedule, and facing a tremendous amount of stress. This week having my go to stress relief of working out a little monkeyed with is not helping. I also saw some pictures of myself that I looked bigger in then I would like to think I am. Of course after this on my way home I wanted to buy some dark chocolate?! Seriously sometimes I wish I could disconnect or reboot my brain. You are not happy with your appearance and weight so you want chocolate? But this is what I have to deal with. This time the chocolate did not win and I listened to a song that just makes me want to dance and wiggled and shimmied my way to picking up my dog. Today I had a turkey burger for lunch which I usually would have had sweet potato fries with but I know I am going out tonight so I skipped the fries and had a side salad. This made me feel good taking control where I can and doing the best I can instead of just throwing my hands up and saying its a bad week. It's as bad a week as I let it be.
should you wish to get your dance on I HIGHLY recommend checking this track out, it's also a free download:
http://www.thefader.com/2011/05/16/sandro-silva-f-isa-gt-told-ya-dj-melos-moombahton-edit-mp3/
Bonus link because I love all of you:
http://www.thefader.com/2011/05/09/adele-jamie-xx-f-cecile-mr-lexx-and-timberlee-rolling-in-the-heat-the-heatwave-refix-mp3/
You're doing really well, these kind of periods are so testing but I know you'll pull through, you are pulling through. You're a strong woman, you're making the effort to keep exercise and healthy choices in your routine and once the tension and general crappiness moves on you'll have survived and things will seem much more dealable than had you totally thrown caution to the wind through it all.
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