Saturday, July 10, 2010
Old Friends New Habits
I have been lucky for the most part. My friends have been super supportive of the changes I have made. They have listened, supported, comforted, lifted me up when I needed it and flagged my crazy when I was desperately in need of that to. I had an experience recently that wasn't awful but left me unsettled. I saw an old friend, one of my oldest actually, who has gained a lot of weight. How much I do not know, but enough to be more then a blip on the radar and more a Houston we have a problem. I can be honest enough to admit a few years ago this probably would have not pleased me but made me feel less alone. Now it does not affect me really except for she had not seen me in a quite and while and I am easily the thinnest I have been in 15 years, and we've been friends for 18. This was not easy for her. There was some passive aggressive behavior, a comment or two, and me being left feeling confused, unsettled, and then well it's her problem not mine. The one positive about when these things happen is I am left with a lesson and more tools to deal with what lies before me. Women are competitive by nature. This is not a new idea, but most of my girlfriends are not. I have one or two, but that's their thing not mine. This friend happens to be competitive and I wonder if my weight loss bothered her more on that level then it did on a weight loss one. Who knows. I could muse about this forever, but what I come back to time and time again is I am doing this for me. Not to upset others, threaten them, for them any of that. For the first time in my life I am getting healthy because I want to and believe at this point in my life it is what I need to be doing for myself. It's a cool thing because besides helping me be more successful it keeps me grounded.